Monday, June 26, 2006

Countdown: 9

Single digits here we go!

One night this week I had a very difficult time getting comfortable in bed, and thought to myself “this is the beginning of the end.” Our friend Sandra said that when she was pregnant she had a very distinct moment where she recognized that she was uncomfortable with her size and stature, and with movement in general, and that it remained that way until the baby made it’s way out. I fear that moment is in the not so distant future. I’m just starting to become uncomfortable at times, and when I realized that this baby was likely to DOUBLE in size from now until he’s born, I just about cried. At about 4 lbs now, babies generally gain about a ½ pound a week in the last 8 weeks. Egads! If I thought I was uncomfortable now, I should likely just shut my trap and hold out for later!

In other news, dear husband has returned from the fair country of Blyth, to me and our disaster of a home, which we plan on righting by the end of the weekend. A few more coats of paint on a few more walls, and we can start hauling stuff back into the basement where it belongs! Out of the living room, out of the dining room, out of the bedroom, off of the porch and lets get some fricking order happening around here because we’re HAVING A BABY IN 9 WEEKS!!!

As far as baby goes, we do have the “basics” on hand – diapers, sleepers, a change table, and various other accoutrements that they tell me I need. The contents of the Holy Shit Bag (as in “Holy Shit, The Baby is Coming, Take Me to the Hospital NOW!) have been mostly collected, and as soon as I dig out a bag from the heap of crap in the living room, we’ll have that ready to go.

I fear for babies that don’t stick to timelines – I have a frightening feel of dread that this baby is going to show up early just to mess with me. I’m a planner, right down to the core. I don’t work well with “spur of the moment” or “lets be spontaneous.” I like to be able to see clearly on my calendar what life looks like for at least the next 3 months. I prefer 6 months. But the fact that this baby could decide to rear it’s head (and hopefully it IS his head that rears first, cause breach births don’t exactly sound like a pleasant way to spend a long weekend) at any time, technically between now and the middle of September, is throwing me for a total loop. We have friends who’s baby decided to come on out at 30 weeks. 30 weeks!!?? That’s like, last week!! I’m not ready! I’m not physically ready, mentally ready, or any other kind of ready that there may be! But when 2 semi-anal Virgos plan on making a baby, that for all intents and purposes should be another semi-anal Virgo (just the way we planned), you’d think the baby would at least have the decency to stick to the plan, him being a Virgo-To-Be and all. Don’t mess with the plan kid, don’t mess with the plan.

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